Life of an Empath

“Dear Tim,

My hamster committed suicide last night. I just thought you should know. He wasn’t sad and had a good life, but he saw the video of my boyfriend getting burned alive and just couldn’t bear it anymore. I don’t know what to do. Even though he survived, my boyfriend looks like a monster now. There’s no way we can have a normal life together again. I know you're probably wondering how hamsters commit suicide, but let me assure you he found a way. I’m sitting here feeling like maybe it should’ve been me instead of cute Mr. littlefoot. But, like the good hamster he was, he took his own life so that I didn’t have to take mine. Now I feel a little guilty.

Anyway, here’s the link to the video, in case you wanted to see it. FYI, it’s pretty gruesome.

Talk soon,

AmyBaby”

That’s what the email said. I’ve read over it a thousand times trying to figure out why in the world Amy would send me a video of her boyfriend on fire, and also, how in the fuck did she get the video?! Did somebody record it instead of helping? I have so many questions. Also, Amy DEFINITELY killed her hamster, right? Like, hamsters don’t just off themselves. How is that even possible?

And that link…the link to the video. I haven’t watched it yet. I’m afraid to click on it. I'm afraid of what I'll see, but at the same time, I'm so god damn intrigued.

Well, fuck. I'm clicking it.

Oh wow. Yeah, he's getting burned, alright. Fuck that is gruesome. And the screams! Ugh. I turned it off. The sounds did me in. I could see his charred skin falling off of his body. I really fucking hope somebody helped him instead of just filmed him getting totally destroyed by the fire. How did it even happen, though? Here come the questions again. I cant. I just can't go down that rabbit hole. Gotta continue with my day.

"Hey, Mr. South! Are you ready for the kids to be here?" That's Charlie, he's a good kid. Student-teacher. Late twenties. You know, like how we all were before we became tenured and tormented every day by these little fucking hellions.

"Hey, Charlie. Yeah, I'm ready. The kids from Carlise High should be here around 09:00. I gotta get ready for them to get here, so I'll catch up with you in a little bit." I blurted out to him.

Really, I just had to piss, and I wanted some time to myself before the events started. Today, we're having the freshmen and sophomores from Carlisle High school come visit our vocational school to see if this is somewhere they'd want to go once they've hit 11th grade. We only take juniors and seniors, but give them the rest of their high school education and also vocational training in their field of choice. We normally only take in 100-200 students a year, but this year has been especially slow, so we've been holding these "open house tours" once a month to try to get all of the high schools in the area interested in our curriculum. Today is the 6th high school to come through our facilities.

The kids arrived as I walked out of the bathroom, so I'll head to the auditorium. They should just be getting settled by the time I get there. There's Amy. She's addressing the kids now. I'll stand in the back by the door. The easiest way out. "...and Mr. South in the back will be giving the first tour!" She blurted.

Oh, I will now? Well, fuck it I guess. I wave my hand to acknowledge my presence, and the kids start to line up by the door. Amy meets me at the door. "I'll take the front, you take the back," she says as she rests her hand on the side of my upper arm. Her hands are gentle and warm. A tingle travels down my spine and I twitch uncontrollably. She knows what she's done, and she's proud of it.

Alas, I quickly snap out of the mini trance I have after I remember the email and video she sent.

I watch her jiggle along into the hall and down the corridor as the students behind her follow.

I take the back, just as she's instructed. We turn down another hallway to head towards the gym, and I can barely hear her voice ahead of me. I'm daydreaming about what I'd do if she and I were alone. Here's that vision of her, assuming ex-boyfriend again. Except now, he's got perfect tits. That's going to be a hard sight to get out of my head. The face of a demon, the body of a goddess. Charred. Except for the tits, of course.

As we are walking, I catch a glimpse of a student ahead of me. It looks like he brought with him a foam sword of some sort. Ugh, I'm going to have to confiscate that. I approach him. "Hey There. It looks like you might have a toy or something with you? What is that?" I inquire. "it's just a sword, dude. Foam. Haven't you ever played sword fighting?" Two other boys chuckle. They're clearly talking about something that they think gay men do for fun. Boy, do they have much to learn. "Well, unfortunately, were going to have to leave those at the front desk until you guys leave. Sorry about that. If you two have them, let's have you guys come along too. I'll show you the back way to the gym where there just happens to be a secret room with air hockey in it if you guys want." They nod their heads in agreement.

As we approach the air hockey room, I lead them inside. "Let's stop here and play a few rounds before we drop the swords off at the desk. Sound good?" The three boys look at each other. One of them that is as tall as me steps forward. What are they putting in the water, again? Damn this kid is huge for his age.

"Listen, man, we know what you're trying to do. You're too old to be cool anymore, dawg," he said with authority. Apparently, he's a hotshot.

"Oh?" I say. "I didn’t think I was trying to be cool. Just trying to give you guys a grapevine for taking your toy swords away. So, you wanna play air hockey or not? We can just head to the front desk if that's easier."

The two other boys glance at the larger one and the boy on the left steps forward.

"Actually, we have different plans, my man. You see these aren't fucking toys." He pulls out the foam sword and shows it in front of his face. He unsheathes the foam to show a full steel blade underneath.

The other boys do the same as I step back and bump the hockey table. "Boys, this isn't cool at all," I explain nervously.

All three charge me. I react and flip over the hockey table and on to the floor.

"Ah! Fuck!" Sharp pain in my lower back appears and I reach around to feel blood.

I stumble up and the boy on the left starts to come after me. I watch his arm fling towards my stomach. This time I grab it and twist his arm. I start to see red. The vision of the boyfriend burning comes into my mind as I think about all of that pain. I feel his pain. I feel my pain. I feel his anger. Anger at being burned alive. About losing the life he had. I feel myself bubbling. Heart racing. I only have a few seconds to get out of this. I remember the screams. I imagine the smell. They just fucking stabbed me. I go blind.

I grab the knife out of his hand and stab him in the neck multiple times.

with each stab, a life taking squish sound emits, and the blood gushes from his neck. I tremble as I step back. The knife clangs as it hits the floor. Fuck, what have I just done!?

The other boys charge, and In a flash, they're on the ground. I'm not sure what happened, but I'm covered in blood. My heart is racing. I'm angry, confused, sad, tormented. What have I done!? What have I done? What have I done.....

I put the blade to my throat. This is what I deserve. This is my end. I accept it. I embrace it. I'll go out my own way. I start to slice my throat, but the blade falls out of my hand as I fall to the floor.

I'm blacking out now. This is it, I guess. I'm done.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sor......

"Wake up Tim! Tim!"

I feel a warm hand cup my face. Still, I see nothing. Only this moment exists. I'm in the dark, but I can feel soft hands caress me and lift my head.

"A...Amy?" I conjure with a fleeting breath.

"Yes, It's me, Hunny. You look in rough shape. It wasn't supposed to end up this way."

"What do you mean? Where am I? I can't see."

"Trust me, you don't want to see what I see right now," Amy assured. "You're in the air hockey room. You're ok now."

"I don't feel ok."

"How much of that video did you watch, Tim?" Amy asked.

"What?" I return to her with a confusing tone.

"How much of the video did you watch?"

"The video of your boyfriend?" I say.

"Well, yes, but he's not my boyfriend. Come on, Tim. I need to know how much of the video you watched," Amy urges me for an answer.

"He's not your boyfriend?" I'm surprised now.

"Tim. How long?" I can feel Amy's frustration in her voice. "We don't have much time," Amy said.

"I don't know. About a minute. Why?" I ask.

"Thanks, Hunny," she said with a soft, relieved voice.

Amy lays my head back down on the floor and I hear her get up.

Then I hear a familiar clang from the floor. Her heels click as she moved back towards where I am laying. I can feel her energy above me. Amy steps over my body and straddles me.

I hear a rustle, and then the sound of a dial tone, then a phone ringing in her ear. A man answers.

"Frank, we'll need to adjust the video. It's too much. He killed the kids." Amy says.

"All of them?" the man answers begrudgingly.

"Yes, Unfortunately," Amy returns.

"Clean it up, Amy."

"No problem! Talk to you later!" Amy Replies with an excited voice.

I can feel her soft hands touch my face again.

"Listen, Tim, sorry all of this happened. But it's time to clean up. It'll all be over soon," Amy explains.

"It's ok," I say.

Then I feel her warm hand on my crotch. She fondles my zipper, then unzips my pants. My heart starts beating faster from excitement.

"Amy, Don't. Please. It doesn't feel right." I explain.

"It'll help you go faster," she says.

I can't fight back. I must only accept. Everything is already black, but now my hearing is starting to fade. I'll surrender to this moment. I'll surrender to the pain.

"Goodbye, Tim," Amy says.

I can still feel the warmth from her hands, but my senses are failing. My heart beats faster, but my mind calms. I take one last breath with my remaining energy.

"Fuck you, Amy."

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